In hopes of meeting new people other than my coworkers, I signed up for a Meetup Group called the Sacramento Singles. This was my first mistake. My second mistake was RSVPing “yes” to the Dance Camp Event. My third mistake was actually attending the Dance Camp Event.
Don’t get me wrong. It was a good idea in theory. There is a fabulous little place in Sacramento called The Ballroom. They teach all forms of partner dance: salsa, tango, merengue, bolero, waltz, ballroom, swing etc. On this particular Sunday, one could get in for only $1 and take back-to-back classes in the various forms of dance. Each hour a new instructor would teach a different form of dance. It was a great way to see what instructors you like and what forms of dance you might be interested in learning. See, good idea in theory.
The trouble is that the problems we women faced at high school dances apparently still exist.
1. There are always more women than men at these types of events.
2. The ladies all want to dance whereas most of the men apparently do not (So, why the hell did they go?!).
3. When you do get a chance to dance it is always with a man who is shorter than you are and creepy and obsessed with your breasts.
At the start of each lesson, the instructors had the women line up on one side of the room and the men line up on the other (junior high gym class flashback!). Then, they would show the dance steps first to the men and then to the women. After this, the instructor would tell the women to go find a partner.
This is where all resemblance to junior high vanished. There was not a single woman who stood there timidly staring at her shoes. Nope. It was like a stampede of horny buffalo charging the last remaining men on earth. It was as if someone had just said “you better hurry or no procreation for you!” I seriously was almost trampled the first time. After that, I just got out of the way. I was not about to claw and scratch and elbow my way toward one of the few men in the room. I wanted to dance as much as the next woman, but I still have my pride. I ask you, why did the women always have to be the ones to find a partner? Did the teachers get a kick out of watching the desperation?
Occasionally I would manage to snag a weak one on the outskirts of the crowd, but in most cases I was left without a partner. Obviously, this sucked! Those of us who were left without a partner were told to stand in between couples and then rotate in. This worked fine until people stopped rotating. However, I did discover one benefit to being without a partner. The instructors would often demonstrate with a leftover woman. This was particularly beneficial in the case of the sexy salsa instructor.
After 45 minutes of formal instruction for each lesson there was a free dance period where we were supposed to practice. That is when my little friend would track me down. Of course, it was nice to finally dance with someone. He was just a little too old for me (older than my Dad!), a little too creepy and a little too interested in my breasts (hey, buddy, my face is up here!). He also refused to rotate, which made it difficult for me to chat up the cute salsa instructor. Eventually I decided to duck out. I ended up missing the last lesson of the day, merengue, but I had enough. L
Every other Meetup Event has been a bust as well. Guess I will be fine with not meeting others besides my coworkers for now. Plus, my coworkers are awesome!
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